Plead With Me

It has been a rough summer for us and it looks like it will continue to be rough for a while. Kristin and I received news this past Wednesday that my dad has cancer. We do not know how severe it is but it appears to be fairly concerning. So, what do I do with such heavy news so soon after the heartache of losing our baby girl?

I have been in prayer more over the past few days than probably any other time in my life. I have thought often of the lessons that I have been learning about God through the life and death of Addie. I know that God is good and that he is sovereign and I know that life belongs to Him. I have also been thinking about a couple of verses in II Corinthians 12. Paul was given a "thorn in his flesh" and here is what he had to say about it.

"Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, to that Christ's power may rest on me.

I noticed that Paul pleaded with the Lord to remove this thing that was so painful. He was open and honest with His God and asked Him to remove this thorn from his life. God responded and the thorn was not removed. Paul heard the Lord and his perspective changed. He no longer pleaded but boasted gladly of his weakness.

So, I think it is ok to plead with the Lord. It is ok to beg for healing or whatever the "thorn in the flesh" may be. And if the thing we are pleading for does not line up with His will, He will let us know. He will tell us what we need to hear and it is at that point that our perspective needs to change.

Please join with me in pleading with God that He would heal my dad.

Being A Father

Kristin and I are doing really well right now. But if you were to ask us again later this afternoon, we may give you a very different answer. The grieving process is not as steady as we might like. One moment we are laughing and joking and the next we are hit with a memory and crying. These ups and downs are slowly becoming less extreme, but I am not sure that they will ever totally level off.

One of the best questions that we have been asked is, "what have you learned about God through this?" I say it is one of the best, because it is one of the most important questions we can ask ourselves. I have learned many new things about God and I am still deep in the learning process. Here are a few of the thoughts running through my head...

• I understand more of what it means to be a father. One of God's names is Father or Daddy. My heart and mind changed with the birth of Addie and I became a father. I became a protector. I would have done anything for that little girl. Why? Because I was her daddy.


• I also know what it means to lose my baby. God sent His Son to earth to live and die. He lived a sinless life and was killed by men. He knows my feelings and understands them beyond my comprehention.


• God is as good today as he was a month ago as he was 1000 years ago. His goodness does not depend on my opinion or the circumstances I find myself in.


• God is the refuge to which I was meant to run. He is my strength and the rock on which I stand. Without Him there is no hope and life is meaningless.